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The Many Facets of IntimacyOne challenge for men may be to expand our concept of intimacy beyond the stereotype that our primary expression or experience of love or closeness is sexual. There are more possibilities for connecting intimately with others. The many facets of intimacy are offered to support our journey as men to reach the fullness of our humanity and to fulfill the rich potential in all our relationships. Many of us, both men and women, may find this list refreshing in the face of the media portrayals of shallow relationships on soap operas and in many movies and consumer ads.
Each exploration of intimacy contains an invitation to explore a richer
depth of
relating.
With sexual intimacy, for example, research indicates that 88% of men
surveyed h
ad
never experienced an actual orgasm. This is not the same as sexual arousal
and ejaculation. Orgasm is a vulnerable and authentic body, mind and emotional
experience
during intense love making where the man feels emotionally closer after
ejaculation.
I.e. Rather than feeling like it's done with and now it's time to sleep.
New possibilities for men. Questions:Who would you like to share this list with? What facets of intimacy are you now celebrating? Which new ways do you want to explore?Sexual Intimacy(erotic or orgasmic closeness)Emotional Intimacy(being tuned to each other's wavelength)Intellectual Intimacy(closeness in the world of ideas)Aesthetic Intimacy(sharing experiences of beauty)Creative Intimacy(sharing acts of creating together)Recreational Intimacy(relating in experience of fun and play)Work Intimacy(the closeness of sharing common tasks)Crisis Intimacy(closeness in coping with problems and pain)Conflict Intimacy(facing and struggling with differences)Commitment Intimacy(mutually derived from common self-investment)Spiritual Intimacy(the we-ness in sharing life's ultimate concerns)Communication Intimacy(the source of all types of true intimacy)Love grows from intimate experiences. There are many ways we can talk about love and many things about love that can be summed up in a word. These two lists may help you sort out what love is or isn't. Love Is...ResponsibilityHard Work Pleasure Commitment Sex Caring Sharing Trust Communication Honesty Compromise Interdependency Asserting yourself Vulnerability Respect Friendship Strong Feelings Acceptance Openness Empathy Openness Honesty Love Isn't...BlamingPossessiveness Pain Violence Sex Intimidation Being selfish Fear Getting Pregnant Lying Controlling Dependency Giving up yourself Intimidation Scoring Proving Yourself Manipulation Expecting all your needs to be met Obsession Jealously
People in Healthy Relationships...
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