LONDON,
Eng., 27 Oct. British fashion designer Alexander McQueen, who specializes
in new design apparel for enceinte clientele, has presented his stunning
new collection at the Spring—Summer 2002 show in Paris. Prominent among
his new creations is a white bullfighter-like ensemble that he gushes will
excite all expectant mothers throughout the known world, not just those
in Spain or Portugal.
Mr. McQueen, who is affectionately known as 'Faggy-Waggy' or sometimes just 'Queenie' by his many friends and admirers in the haute couture fashion scene, lisped that his new designs will especially appeal to stylish, fashion-conscious, middle-aged preggies, who are tired of wearing tent-like clothing to disguise or perhaps to protect the growing fetus. "They want to step out of the stale conventional outfits that rob them of glamour and merely advertises that they're knocked-up," he said.
When word got out that Harrods would have a thousand of the new outfits 'on a Fall, pre-Spring special' in its Haute Mode Fashions Department, expectant mothers were lined up for blocks when the store opened its doors on Monday. When the store was unable to meet the demand, the scene got ugly and several women had their fetuses aborted when a hundred or so disappointed women stomped the floor manager after he told them, "Sorry, ladies, you'll just have to keep wearing your tents."
Achmed Muhammed Al-Fayed, prospective father-in-law of the late Princess Diana and Harrods's owner, said that he regretted that his store couldn't meet the demand, but, he said, "if these ladies would just check out our sporting goods department they will find several stunning and colorful silk tents that any enceinte woman would be proud to wear. Arab women wear black tents all the time — they're called Burqas in Afghanistan where no woman who values her life, pregnant or otherwise, would be seen outdoors not covered in one."
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FOR MORE DESIGNS FOR THE KNOCKED UP IN OUR 2002 EASTER EDITION